Graveyard Dirt: Two Worlds and In-between: Impressive Hernia

September 15, 2008

Impressive Hernia

Filed under: Pay Close Attention

So I said PLEASE, GOD, SHOW ME A SIGN, SHOW ME ANY SORT OF SIGN SO I KNOW THAT IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL! (See FINAL ANSWER.) Wait, wait, I can actually copy and paste shit - LOL!- so I believe a direct quote would be:

PLEASE, GOD, LET THE GASTROENTEROLOGIST LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME THAT THIS IS OBVIOUSLY - OBVIOUSLY! - THE WORLD'S MOST IMPRESSIVE HERNIA, EVER, AND HE'S NOT EVEN ANTICIPATING, IN ANY SHAPE, WAY, OR FORM - A DIFFERENT DIAGNOSIS ONCE THE TEST RESULTS COME IN."

At 1:12 AM today (the day of the full moon, the day of Harvest Moon) I found this "stat" waiting for me:

Click thumbnail for larger image.

When I traced back the search there were only nine web sites that Google even listed for "impressive hernia"; Graveyard Dirt, out of that nine, was number five. (FIVE IS A MAGIC NUMBER!) Regardless of the numbers (BECAUSE 7+1=8 AND 8 FITS -RIGHT NOW- SO THAT'S ANOTHER NUMERICAL THUMBS UP!), I think I just got my answer.

Hiatal hernia, here we come?

(OH, WAIT THAT'S MISSING SOMETHING! I WONDER WHAT IT COULD BE? OH, THAT'S RIGHT, -IMPRESSIVE-! IMPRESSIVE HIATAL HERNIA, HERE WE COME?)

OH, INTERNET, DON'T LISTEN TO WHAT THE NEO-H8ERS SAY, YOU'RE -TOTALLY- MAGIC!